KICKS OF A DYING HORSE

By Maina Kiwiri.

I regret ever meeting you.

Talking to you and knowing you.

I regret falling for you and saying it.

I regret you loving me back,

I regret loving you even more.

Even though I know how sweet it was,

I still regret.

I regret moments we shared together;

The sweet, the bitter, the wrong, the fun, the good ones especially.

I regret ever opening up to you:

My secrets, my being, my thoughts, my self.

Ever placing you queen,

Giving you keys to my heart,

Giving my everything to you,

As if I’d already agreed with God you’d be my wife.

I regret loving you,

I regret.

I regret letting go

When the storm came,

And I couldn't stand.

I regret not standing with you then,

I wish I had sitted.

I regret taking for granted your efforts,

I regret walking out,

On you as if I needed you not.

Causing you so much pain,

As I made merry away with the world.

Knowing too well even then,

What a precious jewel you were to me.

I regret.

I regret you giving up,

On me after such a fight.

I regret you walking away,

Because you could not hold up any longer.

I regret pushing you to that edge,

Till in agony you left my camp.

Knowing too well what I meant to you,

 And me not reciprocating the meaning.

I regret.

I regret you taking his hand,

I regret you falling for him and not me.

I regret seeing you flirt with him,

But doing nothing to hold you back.

I regret you loving him for my place,

My rights gone and freedom of expression.

I regret allowing another man take my place.

I regret losing you.

I regret.

I regret coming back.

I regret loving you again,

Even more with the knowledge of loss.

I regret growing feelings for you again.

I regret not being able to hold them to myself,

The way I love you like never before.

The way I badly want you to myself,

I regret saying it to you already.

The way I cant back off even if I try.

I regret.

I regret wishing I had you again.

If wishes were horses.

I regret the way I cant stop loving you,

The way I cant let go of you

I regret the knowledge of what you mean to me,

 And the way you cant come back to me.

I regret.

 I regret the knowledge,

We can be back together if we wanted,

But its not an option for you.

I regret

I regret trying.

Too hard to win you back.

I regret fighting.

Fighting for what is rightfully mine.

I regret knowing.

Too well the way I wont tire,

Until I have you back.

I regret writing,

Writing down this piece;

Kicks of a dying horse.